Ham Sandwiches
by Torn Angel
Summary: Why not to eat anything Cid gives you!! Pls R&R!!!! This is the updated version cos the other one was bad!


Disclaimer: I do not own Cid Highwind or Vincent Valentine. Thay belong to Square soft.  
  
*****************************************************  
  
(Vincent is sitting in his house, reading a book)  
  
(there is a bang on the door)  
  
Vincent: *sighs* (opens door)   
  
Cid: Hi, Vincent!  
  
Vincent: Hello Cid  
  
Cid: Came I come in?  
  
Vincent: Fine.  
  
Cid: (inside) Can I use your bathroom?  
  
Vincent: Yes, go up the stairs and turn left. Remember turn LEFT, not right LEFT. It's very important.  
  
Cid: Why? Whats right?  
  
Vincent: A room of gothic Mary-Sues.  
  
Cid: Why do you have a room of gothic Mary-Sues?  
  
Vincent: Well I had to put them somewhere.  
  
Cid: Ok then. (goes upstairs) Now, wich door did he say? ( He opens the RIGHT one)  
  
Gothic Mary-Sue#4: Look, an outsider.  
  
Gothic Mary-Sues: HISSSSSSSSSS  
  
Gothic Mary-Sue#4: I am Demonica.   
  
Cid: I'm freeked out  
  
( The door closes behind him)  
  
Cid: Huh?  
  
Demonica: Now we will make you one of us.   
  
Gothic Mary-Sues: One of us, one of us.  
  
Cid: NO! Back off! I'm a guy!!  
  
Demonica: So... You will be a gothic Lary Drew!  
  
Cid: NOOO! LET ME OUT!! (Trys to open door)  
  
Demonica: It turns the other way.  
  
Cid: Huh?  
  
Demonica: The door handle, it turns the other way.  
  
Cid: Thanks! (Opens door and rus out) Whew! That was close! Im gonna explore Vincents home some more!  
  
Cid: (Opens random door, and sees a coffin) AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Dammnit! Vincent realy is a vampire!! I must stop him before he drains the blood of all humanity!! (Goes down stairs)  
  
Vincent: Did you find the bathroom ok Cid?  
  
Cid: Yep, I'm fine, just fine. (Looks suspiciously at Vincent)  
  
Vincent: Do you want to stay for lunch?  
  
Cid: NOOOOOOOOOOO! (Runs out house)  
  
Vincent: (shrugs, goes back to reading book)  
  
Cid: (outside house) I must destroy that fiend!! Ahha!! I have a plan! Hehehehe! (rubs hands together)  
  
Later on that day...  
  
(Cid creeps up behind Vincent)  
  
Cid: Do you wanna Ham Sandwich?  
  
Vincent: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!! (Falls off sofa) Cid!! How did you get in my house??!!!  
  
Cid: I used the chimney!  
  
Vincent: My house doesn't have a chimney Cid.  
  
Cid: I does now!!!  
  
Vincent: Oh. Next time can you please leave my home as you found it.  
  
Cid: Do you wanna Ham Sandwich?  
  
Vincent: No. Thank you.  
  
Cid: Just one?  
  
Vincent: No. Realy, Im fine.  
  
Cid: Pwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeessseeeeee?! *Puppyface*  
  
Vincent: No. Your starting to scare me.  
  
Cid: Go on! You know you want a Ham Sandwich!!!  
  
Vincent: I dont like ham.  
  
Cid: Yess you dooooooooo!  
  
Vincent: No, no I don't.  
  
Cid: Eat one dammit!!!  
  
Vincent: No.  
  
Cid: WHY!!  
  
Vincent: I'm alergic to sandwiches.  
  
Cid: You can't be alergic to sandwiches  
  
Vincent: I am.  
  
Cid: Just F******G well eat one vampire-boy!!!  
  
Vincent: Fine!! (takes a bite out of the sandwich) Cid, this sandwich is awfully 'wet'!  
  
Cid: I know!! It has Holy Water in it!!! Now you will die!!! Mwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!  
  
Vincent: Cid, Im not a vampire.  
  
Cid: Ok. (Leaves)  
  
(Vincent sits down, he starts to read the book again)  
  
Cid: Ok, plan B...  
  
Later on that day.....  
  
Cid: (From outside house) Hay Vincent can I come in?!?  
  
Vincent: You don't have any more sandwiches do you?  
  
Cid: No!  
  
Vincent: Allright. Come in.  
  
Cid: (Comes in holding a large chocolate cake)  
  
Vincent: Whats that?  
  
Cid: Chocolate cake! Do ya want some?  
  
Vincent: Not realy.... I don't trust your cooking at the moment.  
  
Cid: There is no Holy Water in this, I sware on my life!  
  
Vincent: Fine, but only a little. (Brakes a bit off the slice Cid Gives him and eats it.) Uhg! (Spits it out) Cid not to critisize or anything but, this is disgusting! What did you put in it???  
  
Cid: Garlic!!!!! Now die!!! DIE!!! I have saved the world!! WOOHOO!  
  
Vincent: Cid, Im still alive. And not a vampire. What has given you that idea?  
  
Cid: The..The coffin, and the Mary-Sues, and  
  
Vincent: I've allready explained the Mary-Sues. And the coffin is for... For my dog. He's dead. And why where you exploring my house anyway?  
  
Cid: I...ah...Was curious. I'm...I'm sorry Vincent.  
  
Vincent: It is ok Cid. Just promise me one thing.  
  
Cid: What's that?  
  
Vincent: That you will never, EVER cook anything again!  
  
Cid: Done.  
  
*******************************************************  
  
End. I revised the origanal a bit cos it was crap. This is the result. I hope you like it!! 


End file.
